Since I've Been Gone (Crossover with ER, Criminal Minds and Colony)
by GodzillaKitten
Summary: Rick Grimes wakes up in what he thinks is the safety of a new sanctuary. Soon, he finds out that the place he thinks is safe hides secrets, and not everybody can be trusted. Will he get back to Michonne, or will a new enemy, with a familiar face, erase everything the groups have worked for. Characters from ER, Criminal Minds and set in the show Colony.
1. Wake up

The incessant beeping of the monitors grew louder as Rick began to awake, almost as if he was finally coming to the surface from deep under water. Each part of his body felt heavy as he used every bit of strength to open his eyes. He didn't recognize where he was; the room was different from the Alexandria clinic. He slowly looked around the unfamiliar place, his eyes immediately looking for a blue and white vase to the right of his bed. Rather than seeing the familiar image from so long ago, he saw a silver IV pole, holding multiple bags containing medicine he didn't recognize.

The beeping became louder and more persistent as the groggy former sheriff shook off the last vestiges of sleep. He slowly became aware of the IV needle in his arm and the sticky pads on his chest.

"_What the hell is this_?" He thought to himself.

He used every ounce of strength to try to call out, but his dry throat ached from where the intubation tube once stood. The pain in his gut screamed as he tried to sit up in the bed, forcing him to lie down quickly against the soft mattress. The tips of his fingers searched for where the pain came from…the left side of his torso was firmly wrapped in clean gauze.

"What happened? Where am I?" He said aloud, to an empty room.

A flurry of activity began as three nurses came into the room, alerted by the screeching of the monitors. Panic gripped his heart as he struggled to catch his breath. One of the nurses screamed to the hallway, "Get Macones. He's awake!"

The room started to spin as a torrent of activity and murmurs came together as a cacophony of noise, and just as he struggled to make sense of the situation, he once again lost consciousness.

* * *

The room was dark the next time he opened his eyes, just the standard hospital florescent night-lights.

"Hey."

The voice startled him. He felt soft fingers reaching for his hand. As his eyes tried to adjust to the room, he heard the woman say, "you're gonna be okay."

Rick swallowed heavily, trying to work up enough moisture to use his voice, and saw the woman raise a cup of water to his lips. "Little sips." She reminded him.

His gaze lingered on her face, his mind desperately trying to find her name.

"Rick. Can you hear me?"

He slowly nodded, annoyed that he was helpless in the situation.

"Listen, Rick. It's Anne. You're gonna be okay. We're safe now."

She bent down and kissed his lips while running her fingers through his hair.

"We're safe now, baby."

* * *

"More water, please." Rick asked. Anne complied.

He hungrily gulped the cold liquid before Anne put her hand out to stop him.

"Slow down. There's plenty more. Take it easy. Do you know what happened?"

He placed the pink plastic cup back on the table in front of his bed. He sat still, his mind racing…searching for answers. The names Carol, Maggie, Daryl…Carl were stuck in the back of his mind, but there was no other information in the darkness.

"What's the last thing you remember?" She asked, her patience starting to falter.

Rick mumbled before he lifted his hand to the bandage that covered the side of his head. "A horse. I remember a horse. And fire."

His words echoed throughout the room. When he finished, the room fell silent. He didn't see the blank look on Anne's face, but he was too tired and confused to care about it.

"I guess I'm not asking the right questions. Do you remember me? Us? Do you remember this?"

She leaned forward, her lips locking onto his. After a few seconds she felt his hand on the back of her head, holding her close to prolong the kiss. Despite the sudden show of compassion, Rick fought a shiver akin to one from long ago, when he woke up alone in another room, a blue and white vase filled with wilted flowers his only company.

"How could I forget?" He smiled, hoping it would mask the unbridled fear that was coiled in his gut.

* * *

"I've slept enough." Rick thought to himself, as he laid in the hospital bed. Anne's warm body was next to him, their legs entangled under the sheets. He didn't want to fall asleep again. He tried to remember. Waking up in an empty hospital, the upper torso of a corpse reaching for him as he took her bicycle, reuniting with Lori and Carl. His family. His eyes instantly filled with tears thinking of what he once had; a beautiful, loving wife and a son. His family.

He felt his chest tighten with anxiety and he had to rein himself back before the "what-ifs" overwhelmed him. He knew he had to focus on what happened…he didn't remember taking vows with Anne. Although she insisted they were married, he didn't remember.

The room was darkened, and cool. He forgot what it was like to be around air conditioning. Cool white cotton sheets held his body, and he heard the tick-tock clicking of the clock on the wall. Light spilled in from a door left ajar in the corner of the room. He tried to unlock the rational part of his mind and figure out where he was when he heard an explosion of laughter in the hallway. High-pitched, women's' laughter.

He squirmed out of Anne's grasp and rolled onto his side, sitting up and trying to maintain his balance. His bare feet touched the cool floor, and with one hand clutching his robe closed and the other pulling the IV pole, he stood and slowly walked to the window.

He blinked a few times before his brain registered what he was seeing; a functioning city, complete with streetlights, cars driving by and pedestrians walking along without fear. No signs of any walkers, no barricades.

"_What's going on_?" He kept asking himself.


	2. Tell me

Rick spent time staring at the ceiling, the divots in the tiles turning into the vast emptiness that he felt surrounded him.

His trance-like state was interrupted when the door opened and nurses flooded in, checking his vital signs before a petite doctor with short black hair followed.

"You were in an accident. From what we could put together, you were impaled. You lost a lot of blood, and Anne said she witnessed your fall from a bridge after an explosion. She called for us, and we took you here."

He flinched as the doctor lifted one eyelid after another to check his eyes.

"How long have I been out?" He asked.

Doctor Gale Macones responded, "two weeks. You sustained some muscle and tissue damage, but it was a miracle that none of your vital organs were injured. You also had a few bruised ribs and a concussion. You're a fighter, though. You held your own. You've learned to survive. We've noticed healed stab scars, and the wound on your hand was pretty bad. We have you on several medications and antibiotics. Maybe you can tell us your story at some point? You're an interesting case study."

Rick pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and index finger. He briefly hesitated before pleading, "what is this place? Please tell me."

"I'm afraid that's above my pay grade. Your wife may be able to tell you. Can't you, Missus Grimes?"

He didn't notice the bone-chilling glare Macones gave to Anne.

Anne stuttered, "Y..y…you're safe here. It's away from the biters."

"But where are we? Atlanta? Washington? Will somebody please tell me!"

The heart monitors started beeping wildly once again, forcing Macones to reach to a needle in the nearby crash cart.

"No, don't knock me out again. Please." Rick pleaded.

"It's for the best." Macones responded robotically, as she added the medicine to his IV tube.

He slowly felt himself drifting away, as the room became hazy and eventually went dark.

* * *

When he awoke hours later there was just a sliver of daylight coming through the heavy blinds. Rick was relieved when Anne was not next to him; there was just something about him he didn't trust.

As he laid in bed, trying to remember the events that brought him to where he was, a long shadow fell over the floor to the side of Rick's bed. He looked up to and his face froze when he saw an all too familiar person walked into the room. He couldn't form words to the visitor as she came to his bedside.

"Hi, baby."

Lori.

"You…you…you…dead…" He stumbled over his words, unable to speak.

"You're not dreaming. I'm here. I'm real." She said, smiling.

Her hand found his, his fingers overlapping her own.

"The kids. Carl and the baby. Please tell me. I heard the baby cry, but I never knew. Boy or girl?"

Rick just stared at his one-time wife, unable to take his eyes off her. Her brown eyes burrowed into his, her black hair pulled back into a messy ponytail that showed off her swan-like neck. Rick had to look away, surprised by the sudden emotion and confusion that stuck in his throat.

He raised his free hand to cup her face, needing to feel her skin to believe that she was there. She turned her face to the side, inhaling the familiar scent of the man she once loved.

Insctively, he sat up and pulled her to him, their lips meeting softly for a long-overdue kiss. Her mouth opened just enough to let Rick's tongue tease her own. When she heard the cozy moan from deep in his throat, she reluctantly pulled back and cleared her throat.

"It's you. But how?"

"It's me." She smiled. "The kids? Carl and the baby?" Desperately trying to stay away from the details.

"Uh…girl. Baby girl. Judith."

"Let me guess…he named her after his teacher. Missus Muller. She was wonderful. How's our boy."

Rick's face fell, telling Lori all she needed to know. Her eyes immediately filled with tears before she bent over and dry heaved until she caught her breath.

"We'll talk later. I gotta go." She sobbed, squeezing the hand that still connected the two.

Before he was able to cry out for her to stay, he watched her leave. The look of anguish on her face cut him to the core, and when he put his own hand to cover his face, he noticed a note she slipped into his hand. Unwrapping it, he read the words, "Don't ask any questions. We'll talk later."


	3. Starting to Remember

By the time Rick was showered and dressed in a new pair of scrubs, sun was well up. It shone through the floor-to-ceiling window across the room, settling in warm patches of light across the linoleum floor. Anne was sitting on the bed with him, rubbing his back in little circles while offering up a sly smile which did little to lighten the uncomfortable silence between the two of them.

It was time for him to be released from the hospital but didn't know where he was supposed to go. The note Lori slipped him, warning him not to ask any question, still lingered in his head. He couldn't shake the dark, nefarious feeling that was tightly coiled in his gut.

The door swung open, welcoming in a tall doctor with salt-and-pepper hair, followed by what he was still convinced was another hallucination.

"Good morning, Sheriff. I'm Doctor Doug Ross, and you know my nurse, Lori Ross."

"Morning." she smiled, as she placed a plate of scrambled eggs and sausage on his bedside table. "Coffee, light with milk and two sugars." She smiled.

He mumbled a soft 'thanks' and picked up the fork, pushing at the eggs, but not eating. His mood on this morning was sullen, and there were dark smudges beneath his eyes.

"You're a nurse?" He asked in surprise.

A curt nod was her response, and the expression of her face made it clear not to ask any more questions.

He listened to the doctor's instructions, obeying his commands to follow the tip of his finger with his eyes as it moved side to side, his legs kicking when the soft hammer hit the kneecap.

Doctor Ross placed the stethoscope against Rick's chest, asking him to take deep breaths before nodding with approval that he passed the rudimentary tests.

"Okay. You're good to go. Someone will be in to give you the rules of this place, and you'll be escorted to your living quarters."

"What is this place? Where are we? What rules are you talking about?" He begged.

"Missus Grimes, will you excuse us? We need to discuss his after-care follow."

"I'm his wife."

"And _I'm_ his doctor. Let me show you out and _my_ wife can explain the rules."

Before she could protest, Ross placed his hand on her arm and pulled, firmly but gently, taking her out of the room and leaving the two former spouses together.

Rick thought wistfully the terrible morning so long ago, when their eyes met from across the prison yard. He never knew that was the last time he would see her. Back when they had what they thought was the safety of the prison. Before the Governor took over. Before Hershel. Before Negan. Before Glenn. Before Abraham, Tyreese, Bob, Beth…and Carl.

He remembered a different time, when they were smiling and cheerful, kissing her goodbye in the morning before going to work, taking his coffee filled thermos and feeling the silky-smooth feel of her skin, the smell of her lavender lotion. Things he took for granted, times he'd used her as a prop and nothing more.

She walked closer to him, her thighs resting on the mattress between his legs. His eyes followed her; the grace of the simple motions, the length of her fingers as they cupped his face in her hands, They were the movements of life, the things he'd always taken for granted before – things of beauty that now seemed so out of place to him in his world.

"Lori…"

She leaned forward, her lips meeting his ear. She whispered softly, "there are cameras everywhere. Even in the bathrooms. I asked my friend Penelope to pause the one in this room, but I have to talk fast. Just listen. This is a colony – some sort of planned community. The powers that be here are in charge of everything. We have to behave – everything here is monitored and rationed. You have to get a job and be productive or they throw you over the wall. You and Anne will live with me and Doug. He knows about you, but Anne doesn't know about me. We have to pretend we don't know each other."

"How are you alive?" He whispered.

"People have been watching us from the start. There were people in B block at the prison. I heard Carl cry, and he missed the shot. Our boy…he couldn't shoot me."

Rick wrapped his arms around her torso when her voice started to quiver.

"I'm okay. Everyone has lost people. Doug and I raising four kids whose parents died. One's a little girl whose mom died in labor – how ironic is that?"

"We've been spied on?"

"Yes. Since the start. And we think there's someone on the inside there now, but there are so many other communities it's hard to keep track. But you're safe now. Just stay with me and Doug, and don't ask any questions. Only tell Anne the basics."

She took a step back and Rick noticed that her usual necklace hung on her neck, her wedding and engagement rings joining the infinity symbol charm. He longed to reach out and kiss her, to tell her how sorry he was for how he treated her, how he would do things differently.

And how much he missed her.

"We've got to go." She whispered, her eyes darting around the room for the cameras.

His arms fell to his side as she took a step backwards, their eyes meeting and holding back years of countless emotions. She helped him pull on a new pair of sneakers, his eyes firmly on her new wedding ring which graced her finger.

"What's taking so long?" Anne demanded, as she flung open the door and stood with one hand on her hip in defiance.

"I'm sorry, Missus Grimes. We're all done here." Lori responded quickly.

She extended her hand to help Rick stand, steadied him on his feet, and waited for the orderly to bring in the wheelchair to escort him out of the hospital.

"Thank you, ma'am."

"You're welcome. My shift is over, so I'll be bringing you to your living quarters."

Rick nodded, before his mouth fell agape when the orderly walked in the room.

"Hello, sir."

Heath.

"Hop in. I'll take you outside." His flat affect served as a warning for silence.

* * *

Lori drove the Range Rover down streets in which people roamed without fear of the undead, but under the watch of armed guards. Being in the passenger seat gave Rick the opportunity to examine his surroundings – he noticed a solid concrete wall, at least thirty feet high, with more armed forces walking on top of it.

"This place seems nice. Seems safe."

"Very much so." Lori replied, her familiar tone which let Rick know she wasn't telling the truth.

The city street soon became a rural neighborhood, and Lori turned onto Sycamore Avenue.

"Home sweet home." She smiled, pulling into a blue colonial.

The trio walked to the door, which was opened by a young lady with a peppy attitude.

"Hi Elodie. How were they?"

"Hi Missus Ross. They're fine as usual."

Rick stood back as twin toddlers ran towards Lori, their arms extended in excitement.

"Mommy! Mommy!"

"There's my boys." She said happily, squatting down to embrace the children.

"Rick these are my sons, that's Billy and this is Benjamin. They're three. Clementine is nine months old and taking a nap, and somewhere around here is two-year-old Connor."

"You've got your hands full." Rick said with a smile.

"Oh yeah, it's worth it. Especially after...especially when we're safe here."

"Mama why are you crying?" Benjamin asked.

Shaking her head, she comforted the young boy. "I'm not crying, honey. Remember how I always sneeze when the pretty flowers come out? That's all this is. Can you welcome our guests? This is Mister and Missus Grimes."

Rick didn't shy away from embracing the boys, although his heart immediately ached for when Carl was the same age, and his concern for Judith made him shiver. He had to get back to them…his memory was slowly returning. Reflecting on his past life hurt like hell. Just like sand scrubbing against a wound he could not reach, so far down inside of him that it made him want to scream. He had to get back.

Anne coldly reached her hand out to shake the boys' hands, uttering a simple, "hello."

"Why don't you two get settled. Rick, you're the same size clothes as Doug, so a few of his things are in your closet. Anne, we can go to the reserve later and get you some clothes if you want."

The woman who betrayed Rick twice gave a steely glare to his one-time wife, not responding with an answer.

Interrupting the painfully awkward stare-down was Billy, in a chipper voice. He asked Rick, "wanna play catch with me?"

With a twinge of heartache, Rick smiled at the tot and said, "of course."

He chuckled to himself as the twins ran toward the back door, searching for their shoes and quickly getting ready for playtime in the backyard.

He exchanged a smile with Lori before following the boys. He knelt to tie their shoes and watched as they plucked some balls from a plastic tote near the back door.

His heart froze when he saw a printed name on the checkered pattern of the soccer ball. Memories, hazy at first and buried deep in his psyche, came rushing back.

Winslow.


End file.
